You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
