Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper

  (785): View more from Kansas

  He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.

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  (316): I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper (785): He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not. http://tfl.nu/pqqj
  Replies (32) Good night (3343) Bad night (1029)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.

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  (770): I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass. http://tfl.nu/0fum
  Replies (48) Good night (971) Bad night (3025)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by

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  (970): You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by http://tfl.nu/7cd3
  Replies (13) Good night (4009) Bad night (981)
• Favorite

  (754): View more from Florida

  you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse

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  (754): you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse http://tfl.nu/okem
  Replies (14) Good night (1009) Bad night (3491)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning

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  (516): She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning http://tfl.nu/jaay
  Replies (12) Good night (1727) Bad night (6722)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...

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  (619): You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one... http://tfl.nu/h6us
  Replies (13) Good night (3633) Bad night (1835)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.

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  (419): More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill. http://tfl.nu/mtxw
  Replies (6) Good night (3302) Bad night (947)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.

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  (727): whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob. http://tfl.nu/6fb1
  Replies (6) Good night (915) Bad night (2794)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7

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  (617): On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7 http://tfl.nu/lyiq
  Replies (3) Good night (2635) Bad night (882)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth

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  (707): Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth http://tfl.nu/or2s
  Replies (17) Good night (508) Bad night (1735)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.

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  (614): Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love. http://tfl.nu/irrq
  Replies (7) Good night (1031) Bad night (434)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.

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  (250): You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette. http://tfl.nu/i44j
  Replies (1) Good night (692) Bad night (292)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities

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  (419): Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities http://tfl.nu/xynh
  Replies (9) Good night (465) Bad night (1771)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.

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  (570): It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk. http://tfl.nu/rmsw
  Replies (4) Good night (593) Bad night (380)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.

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  (301): Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask. http://tfl.nu/cyae
  Replies (4) Good night (428) Bad night (249)

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