Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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