i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize