Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
