you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
