i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
