How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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