I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
