I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize