porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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