How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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