So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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