just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Randomize
