that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
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