how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Randomize