Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
