I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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