I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
