Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
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