my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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