honey bunches of taint.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
How many fucks given?
0.12846
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
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