Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
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