Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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