My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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