haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
