the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
