I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
