and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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