Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize
