I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize