I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
