what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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