I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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