worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
