her vagine was all disorganized.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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