End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Randomize
