I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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