i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Randomize
