Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
