my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize