Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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