paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this boner is exhausting
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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