"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Success! We fucked roommates!
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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