Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
