Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
