look no pants
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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