I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Randomize
