But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
