I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
